This Christmas

The past few days have been absolutely crazy.  I'm sure that's applicable for everyone.  But for whatever reason, this Christmas season seemed way busier than any I remember.

I'm so sad that I don't have any pictures for show from this weekend (I've GOT to get some more batteries for the camera).  We were able to spend some good time on Christmas eve with Mark's family here at our house.  They came over in the afternoon and stayed for dinner and a fire.  Christmas day was hectic.  I spent all morning in the kitchen cooking a few dishes and then we hung out with friends for the day... til 2 am.  Finally, last night we spent the evening with my family for dinner and a gift exchange.  It was definitely an on-the-go kind of Christmas.

That was kind of weird for me, because I'm used to Christmas day (and typically the days surrounding it) being completely relaxing.  But it was still so good to see family and friends.

On a slightly different note, Mark and I have been thinking a lot lately about the heart behind the giving.  I love giving gifts, all through the year.  There is a part of me that hates the commercialism of Christmas, but since I love buying and wrapping and giving gifts, there's another part of me that LOVES Christmas.  (Mark is a scrooge, and he admits to this.  Every year he says "Christmas is cancelled."  You can go ahead and feel sorry for Roscoe.)  But I hate the "obligatory" feeling when someone gets you something and you feel you must buy in return, putting hours into searching for something for someone only to find out they didn't like what you got them, being scrutinized by someone as they anxiously watch you open a present, etc.  It all just seems like a bunch of unnecessary pressure.  If I buy you a gift, don't feel like you must give one in return.  And if I receive a gift, I am going to be grateful for your thoughtfulness regardless of whether I liked it.  And as I open a present from you, please don't worry or feel the need to give disclaimers in case I don't like it (although I fully understand that angst, I'm still working on this one).

Maybe those feelings come from remembering Christmases that were pretty slim.  Because there were times I got phone calls from friends who wanted to tell me about the more than a dozen gifts they got, when each of my brothers and I had gotten 2 or 3 (which, even then, I knew was more than many people get).  "Oh, but I didn't get this, which is what I really wanted."  I would be so mad at those kind of statements.  My mom and dad had put everything they could into Christmas (and still do).  Some years it was more than others, some years less.

As far back as I can remember, my family had practiced what we call "circes" (pronounced sir-sees).  It's the seeing-a-gift-so-and-so-would-love-while-you're-not-even-looking-for-anything-for-them thing.  Sometimes it even happens while you're at the grocery store.  Those are great.  Out of the blue and not expected.  It's the best surprise.

Mark and I are wondering about how possible it would be to try a "no-gift" Christmas one year.  Where you spend time with family and friends without the pressure of the gifts.  (No, I'm not saying we're never going to buy Roscoe Christmas presents.)  Or, as my mom suggested, use the money you would spend on each other and compile it to adopt a family who won't be getting anything.

Hmmm.... I wish I could read what you're thinking right now.