it all looks different now

A week has gone by since our Roscoe's birth, and I must say that I still feel like I'm dreaming.  It's just taking forever to wake up.  Am I really a mom?  Is there really a little baby boy dependent on me for his food?  Is this little one really a living combination of Mark and me?  Is the love of my life really lying next to me right now with our son sleeping on his chest?

Yes we have had to adjust.  Yes we have already wanted to pull our hair out when Roscoe's crying seems inconsolable.  Yes I do miss being able to channel all of my attention to my husband.  But I'm sitting here typing this listening to little baby coos and sighs as he drifts off into that deep deep baby sleep and I wouldn't trade it for anything.  Mark is the best.  He's so willing to help me in any way.  I've already heard multiple times from him (something like) "I obviously can't feed him, only you can satisfy that need.  But anything else I can do.  Let me help.  He's our responsibility, not just yours."

But the oddest thing to me is that everything looks different now.  I know I'm seeing through the same eyes that I had 10 days ago, but now it's just.......different.  When I get up and walk through the house, it doesn't look the same that it did weeks ago.  And that has nothing to do with the cleanliness of each room.  Today I went to Target while Mark was home with Roscoe.  And even that quick errand seemed so different.  A simple errand I've made dozens of times changes when it's done through the eyes of a mother.  The roads have changed, the store has changed, my car has changed.  Everything.  It almost feels like when you've moved to a new area and are having to acclimate to your new surroundings.  Only you know exactly where you are.

Hmmm..... This doesn't sound like it makes too much sense.  Maybe there are some mothers out there who can agree or expound more proficiently than I can.  Or maybe it just really is hard to describe.  Maybe it's motherhood.