catch up and announcement

It's been so long since I've updated because I don't know how to blog without including a big part of what's going on in my life.  I guess if I'm going to write about my life here, and I've got something I'm not ready to share yet, it's hard to write anything at all.

So with that said, if you don't know this already, baby #2 is on the way!  We're thrilled.  I'm due around the beginning of February, and Roscoe's birthday is February 13, so they'll be 2 years apart, which is what we originally wanted when we first started discussing having children.

Just another week or so of 1st trimester, which excites me beyond what I can express.  I'm ready for energy to return for sure.  The sickness this time only seemed to be hard-core for about a month, whereas with Roscoe it was all day every day for the first trimester, with throwing up at least once a day.  But I could literally lie around all. day. long.

Are we wanting a girl?  Well, of course.  We would both love to have a daughter, but I'm trying not to think about it too much because I know I would be totally in love with another little guy as well.  I don't want to get all hyped up for a girl only to find out it's a boy and have to deal with a guilty feeling of disappointment.  A baby is a gift no matter what gender, health, etc.  Besides, we won't find that out until the end of October anyway, so that's too far away to be thinking about right now.

I did have to temporarily abandon the "no 'poo" experiment.  I went without using shampoo for a solid 3 months, substituting baking soda for it.  But my hormone levels went so crazy at the beginning of this pregnancy that I couldn't take the oily-ness anymore and couldn't seem to trouble shoot it.  So I'm back to using shampoo for the moment.  Bleh.  Oh well, I'll get back to it again.  (But see, I didn't know how to update about that when I made that change...without saying "I had to start using shampoo again because my hair got so greasy because WE'RE GOING TO HAVE ANOTHER BABY.")

Oh, and just to explain, we wanted to wait a bit to announce the pregnancy because sometimes pregnancies can seem soooo looooong when they're announced early.  If we kept it a secret for a month or so, our theory is that it would make it feel a little faster.  We'll see if that worked...

Roscoe is being my little sweetheart these days.  I often get a few visits from him while he's playing--just so he can cuddle and smile with me for about 15 seconds before he tears off again.  It's so nice to be able to experience a child learning to give/receive love.  I know I'm just going to die when he reaches the age to tell me he loves me.

a better day

I am currently thankful that, despite a few episodes, today was pretty much a normal, fit/tantrum free day for the little guy.  I did notice that I was focusing more attention on him, putting the iPhone away, and not trying to multitask so much when he was wanting to play with me.  I'm not sure if that's what made the difference or not.  But it did take a lot of effort.  To be honest, keeping up with him wears me out!  He's absolutely exhausting.

He's been in bed almost an hour, and I've been sitting in the silence trying to upload pictures from the beach.  Apparently I'm running low on disc space on the laptop, so we need to clean the computer out before I can get those pictures in and uploaded here.

when the little one seems too big

I've been struggling with Roscoe.  It seems like the "terrible 2s" have arrived early.  More like the "terrible pre-18months," only the tantrums and fits seem to be directed mostly at me.

I just got off the phone with Mark about this, and he was encouraging (as encouraging as he can be, because this is not an easy phase for me)... But I thought I'd get my thoughts out, let you into my head, try to relinquish my stubborn "I-can-do-it-myself" childlikeness, and make myself open to suggestions and advice.

Roscoe has always had a tendency to pitch a fit.  That started when he was tinier than tiny.  But those fits used to be easily corrected (easily enough).  He responded to our correction.  Now, he's putting up really really big fights.  His temper is...just right there....right under the surface ready to explode.  And when he doesn't get what he wants, BOOM!!!!!!

Without giving examples, I'll say that 90% of the time, with words and facial expressions Mark can correct him and get the desired response.  It isn't easy, but it works.  The other 10% of the time that Mark handles it, it takes more effort. 

I feel like the numbers are reversed for me.  For whatever reason, my 90% is full of frustration and failure, where on my end I'm receiving abuse and anger from my own son...my 15 month old son.  Often he gets angry at me and screams in my face multiple times, sometimes throwing a hit in there.  Discipline doesn't seem to phase him, so it just turns into a seemingly endless cycle of whining, fussing, screaming, correction, wash, rinse, repeat.

I think what is the hardest for me is that all I feel that I do is pour love into him.  I feed him.  I play with him.  I bathe him.  I change his diapers.  I wash his diapers.  I tuck him in bed.  He is my job, he's what I am employed to care for 24/7.

And he returns that with consistent tantrums and ungratefulness?

Another frustrating factor is that I generally stay calm and even-keeled.  He's not feeding off my temper because I'm not releasing a temper.

So, I know that this is really something that all moms have to deal with.  I've had multiple family members/friends tell me that when daddy comes home, the babes are angels.  But God help the mother during the day, because those same babes are running around like demons.

So how do we deal with it?  How do you keep control of your child when it seems like everything you do is a failure?  How do you handle the emotional let down of wanting to receive love back from your child and the bulk of what you see returned to you is negativity?

Moms, speak...

He is always this non-stop

...but not always this fast.

Thanks for another video of my little wind-up toy, Mom!

the technical (but not official) first haircut

For a few weeks now, we've been having to constantly brush the hair out of Roscoe's eyes, because he doesn't quite have the knack of doing it himself.  But we love it so much that we don't want to cut it all off yet.

So tonight I got up the nerve to do it.  I don't know how I succeeded, considering that Roscoe never stops moving when he's awake.  But it's done.  Hair trimmed, eyes clear of obstruction.  Remainder of the locks fully in tact.

So technically?  Yes, he's had a hair cut (like, 80 of them) (ok more than that).  But is this as big a deal as the oh my goodness you look like a kid now not a baby haircut?  No.



Good grief.... Even that little half an inch makes all the difference. 

In case you need to smile...

This video brought to you by my mother, who once again got creative with a fun video she took while babysitting.

This is what happens when you put a full plate of spaghetti vermicelli noodles in front of Roscoe.  Thanks, mom!  Cracks me up.

A nice surprise

Mark just called me about an hour ago to let me know he was driving home.  Rarely does he get to start his 10 hour drive home before noon, and most commonly it's about 2 or 3 pm.  What a nice surprise!  The only problem is I thought I had all day to get the house cleaned to my "Mark's-homecoming-specifications."  In reality I have about 3.5 hours.  Good thing we have a less than 900 sq ft home!